Abandoned House!

I went on an excursion to Manitou with some friends of mine over the weekend and found this abandoned house. I guess it has been uninhabited since the early eighties, or so one of my friends (Lori Blondeau) has claimed. It is a strange thing, this house, there are preserves in the cupboards, pills in the medicine cabinet, purses, shoes, and hats strewn about - there is even one solitary handmade grey dress in one of the upstairs bedrooms. No doubt it has been host to some parties and a few vandals since the inhabitants absconded... and there is a very heavy feeling about it.

The ceilings are caving in and birds have nested above the moldings and wall sconces, and there is still a plastic 40th anniversary cake top sitting on the kitchen counter and bottles ready to be taken outside near the back door. Walking through the ramshackle building made me think about the vanity of life, how earthly treasures are so very corrupted. The whole experience was like touring through a stranger's photo album - a simulacra of memories I've never shared but am uncannily familiar with. Whoever lived there is now only present through echoes of rotting wood, strewn magazines, and a few hats with no body to rest on.

Tale of the Two Birthday Cakes

So I officially became 26 yesterday. I look at that number and it really is foreign to me - as though it were someone else's number. I could swear I'm only thirteen on the inside but time's footprints in my life are saying otherwise even if I still sometimes feel the flush of embarrassment, child-like uncertainty, and the excitement of a toddler over the smallest things (for instance finding a restaurant serving Dr.Pepper). God's given me twenty-six years to live, thus far, and my deepest desire would be to honor Him for the rest of the days He's allotted me.

So I've started a tradition to ask the Lord for something, very specifically to fill a deficiency, on my birthday that is in line with His will and can work for the benefit of His kingdom. This all began because yesterday was a double birthday for me. Seven years ago yesterday I dedicated my life to Jesus, unfortunately that doesn't mean that I get two cakes ;)

And, no, I'm not exposing what I asked for but those who know me, even remotely well, could make some plausible guesses!

How can I be pure?

How can a young man keep his way pure? By keeping it according to Thy word... Thy word I have treasured in my heart that I may not sin against Thee. Psalms 119:9,11

So here it is. I've asked myself how can I keep my way pure, because I deeply desire purity and a righteous spirit, how can I live according to God's will, how can I keep from stumbling, how can I keep from sinning against the Lord?

By choosing to keep my every step according to the Word of God, by hiding his Word in the very depths of my heart so that I may be prepared to overcome trials and temptations that hit me every day. If His word is embedded in me and I sincerely focus on His face, praying/reading/memorizing/ and meditating on His promises, then how much easier it is to live purely. If my daily walk is hand in hand with Christ then I will reap His fruit because I share His heart (Psalm 1). But if I stray from that path then I deprive that relationship and my fruit will be spoiled and my leaves wither - because in Him only lay my sufficiency. If I sin against my body, a brother, a friend I violate all those in periphery, including myself, and Jesus. I would rather have my days here on earth to echo His righteousness and walk according His best plan than flounder around in my own destructive understanding which only promises the deepest of sorrows.

I'm so glad God has given me a way of escape from sin and the darkness it brings! How wonderful is it to live and walk in joy which only comes through freedom in Jesus.

Just a Teaser!

Just a poor quality digital I snapped during the shoot tonight - for composition's sake. I'm dropping the film off tomorrow... but you get the idea.

There is a party in my basement tonight.

Okay, this shoot is from a year ago. But, I'm doing a similar thing tonight in my living room, I've built a false floor of white and off white tiled carpeting and have covered the furniture in white paper and poly plastic. The idea is to have the entire room appear a crisp white while all activity within the room will be in color (dummies/people, the 'food' they've spilled, and their colorful party paraphernalia...) It'll be an abstract of the human condition - human embarrassment and pathos in all it's domestic grandeur! I'll post a picture once I develop the film.

I'm using one of those massive large format 4x5 hasselblad cameras (the kind with the cloth covering so as to see the viewfinder) as well as a medium format borrowed from the University. Shesh, I'm going to miss all their toys.

August Update

Welcome to my blog! So here is an update for those both near and far away. I'm almost done my school here in Saskatoon. My thesis exhibition is in October and I'll be moving back to Edmonton in November sometime. What will I do then you ask? Well, as most of you know I went to grad school because, besides becoming a better artist, I wanted to teach art at a University... but all that has changed. I've taught some courses and spent a great deal of time seeing what life would be like as faculty and my heart has turned about the whole thing.

So what will I do NOW? I've applied and been accepted to be full time commissioned staff with Campus Crusade for Christ. I'll be working with students on campus in a full time ministry capacity... so I guess to a large extent I'm still working at a University teaching. Funny how things go. And no, I won't quit making art and exhibiting (what exact capacity this can happen remains to be seen). I'm not sure what city I'll end up in but I'm fairly sure I'll be staying within Western Canada, Edmonton? Calgary maybe?

For most of you this will seem like a violent change from my original trajectory, but I assure you this is a really good thing. These past two years held a serious learning curve and I've finally discovered the joy of following God's particular path for me. I realize that my days are numbered and I seriously want to make every one of them count by trusting God in following His invitations and heeding His word because I love Him.

I'll be sending out invitations for my exhibition so send me your address if you know I don't have it and I'll drop a fancy postcard invite in the mail for you. And if you are planning to be in this area on October 21st then please come to my closing party at the Gallery. It really will be an over the top spectacle.

Big Love,
Tiffany

The question is... where do I sit?

Have you ever thought about where your conciousness actually sits in the body? I know that my head works because my blood supplies it with oxygen and thus makes sure all my systems are running, my hormones are hormoning, and my heart thumping, my mind sorting, and my fingers tracing... but where do I sit?

Is it behind my eyes, in my chest perhaps? It couldn't be any of my appendages because if they were amputated I would still live. But, if my head was lopped off or my heart cut out then I would loose an additional 21 grams. Where does that weight sit and of what matter is it made? If it is invisible, like breath, then is it this essence all I am?